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Thread: Never thought I'd be a single Mum of 5!

  1. #16
    Hey Lucy. I am not shocked at what you wrote. I think it's a good thing. Whilst it might be purely physical, as long as you are safe, it's part of reconnecting, rebuilding and rediscovering yourself, IMHO. The "safe" bit is important though. Long ago when my self worth was gone, I did stupid things and I did not play safe, and whilst I got away with it, I am now a bit shocked at recalling what I did when I was so low down. Scares me so much to think if my daughters ever played roulette with their safety like I did... I'd be devastated. Anyway, that's just an aside. I am sure you are being sensible.. X

    And you know what, him being miserable! is that a ruse to make you feel guilty?! Well effing tough t*tty. one's heart bleeds.

    Sorry for my rambled thoughts. Glad you are still here. Think there are just about 10 or so of us left around here... how sad. The forum is dead. I don't want to use the FB one either. The two of us are never going to meet up are we, despite being relatively close to each other, are we
    Mama to two miracles - K born Dec 2011 and T born in Mar 2016

  2. #17
    Registered User LucyMum's Avatar
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    Hiya Savannah,

    Hey we can meet up on the New Year if you like xx

    It's great for me to get out at the moment. I met up with a friend from uni I hadn't seen for something in the region of 12 years the other week, she lives back in Southampton now.

    Yes I definitely know what you mean. It is strange being thrown back into that world where I know I have to be very careful and watch my back but it's amazing how quickly it's coming back I was the same when I was younger, was a bit careless at times, especially when I was a student but after the first time Jon ditched me too (way back, before we had kids)....went out and had a one night stand straight away, and several others followed

    I'm amazed at how many single 40 somethings there are out there. I've only actually had anything physical with one guy though I've got a friend who is trying his luck don't think I want to go there....

    Oh J is posting so much on facebook at the moment, he's got a following of American women from his forum plus a few more female work buddies who seem to like to humour him.....it's actually quite funny

    10 of us, blimey that's scary, I remember how many ladies used to be on here in an evening. Another example of changing times....I would never post this kind of personal stuff on facebook though I must say.
    LucyMum The 42 yr old One Tubed Lady
    Out of difficulties grow miracles, Jean de le Bruyere

    Cheering for super sticky BFPs for all the ttc fab fertile fogies

    Mum to Daisy (14), Rosie (12), Ruby (8), Eira (4) & Nerissa born 19/2/16
    MC July 2007 6+3wks Babaloon,
    MC August 2011 10wks, little Tiny Ears RIP babies, we will never forget xxx

  3. #18
    Yay! Do you fancy meeting one Thursday morning in Jan? It's my one day off work We could take the younger ones to Poulton park, I think that's reasonably half way between us? I've always fancied going.

    I was thinking the other day... You have Eira, I have Keira. Similar ages. You have Ness, I have Tess. Similar ages. Spooky!!! xx
    Mama to two miracles - K born Dec 2011 and T born in Mar 2016

  4. #19
    I hope your christmasses went ok ladies? It was strange and sad but not as bad as I thought it would be. I only spent xmas alone from 3pm so wasn't too bad. I had the dog for a cuddle and nap on the sofa. actually that is quiet sad considering last year I had a family all day. ah well sh*t happens! Glad to see the back of 2018 hoping this one is better!

  5. #20
    Happy New Year ladies! Not a good start to the year year, 12 days (and counting) in bed with the most horrid virus. Hope you are doing better than me, although that's probably not hard! xx

    Here is to a better 2019 for you Sage and Lucy. Sorry it was a bit lonely for you Sage xx
    Mama to two miracles - K born Dec 2011 and T born in Mar 2016

  6. #21
    Registered User LucyMum's Avatar
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    Hiya ladies, sorry I've not visited here for a while.

    That facebook group is okay but definitely not the same.... I never like to say too much on there..

    Savannah we must definitely do that. Do you know when it opens, I wasn't sure if it was open in the winter? I hope yhriou're over your virus by now. We had some horrible coldy thing over Christmas too though I was lucky this time and didn't get it too badly, Rosie had it much worse..

    I'm glad your Christmas wasn't too bad Sage, mine wasn't as bad as I thought it may be either. Mum invited us to her place for dinner so we had the breakfast and presents here and then went down there for the evening. J went to his parents, I don't know if he was expecting me to invite him here but Rosie would have been hiding in her room the whole time like she did the previous Christmas so I didn't think it would be a good idea.

    How are things now Sage, I hope 2019 is going to be better too. We've had some ups and downs but generally I think we're doing ok. Eira and Ness have settled down and stopped getting upset when he leaves, to be honest they don't talk about him as much now. They don't see all that much of him, only for a couple of hrs a week. He came up the other night for Ness's birthday tea, that went okay, the littleuns were pleased to see him....Rosie sat and snarled in her room, have tried to explain to her that Ness wants him here and we have to put up with it for a couple of hrs for her sake as he's her Dad but there's no talking to 14 year olds is there!

    We went to Butlins for the beginning of the half term to celebrate mine and Ness's birthday, took my Mum with us. We all had a really good time, the best birthday I've had in a long while.

    I think we're getting there and I've started to think about what we are going to do when we sell the house. I really like the west country but would have to persuade the bank to give me a small mortgage to go there. I've got something that I'm working on right now, not sure whether to write it here or not as it's pretty controversial and I doubt very much that it will happen but I've thought a lot about it and I have to try so that I can finally be at peace with myself and my choices after the way J made me feel about it. Anyway, due to that I'm going to put off moving until next year and that will also give Daisy stability whilst finishing her gcses and give me time to work out where exactly is going to be best for us to go.

    So things are definitely looking better than last February when I was a depressed nervous wreck.... just before everything went wrong, can't believe it'll soon be a year since he dumped me - April to be precise!
    Last edited by LucyMum; 22-02-2019 at 12:40 AM.
    LucyMum The 42 yr old One Tubed Lady
    Out of difficulties grow miracles, Jean de le Bruyere

    Cheering for super sticky BFPs for all the ttc fab fertile fogies

    Mum to Daisy (14), Rosie (12), Ruby (8), Eira (4) & Nerissa born 19/2/16
    MC July 2007 6+3wks Babaloon,
    MC August 2011 10wks, little Tiny Ears RIP babies, we will never forget xxx

  7. #22
    Hiya Lucy. Just saw your post. Glad you are feeling brighter about stuff now. Hard to blame Rosie for being difficult about it isn't it... poor thing. It's amazing the little ones are so resilient but as you say, they see him so rarely now, they know who the main caregiver is.

    Im so ill with a bad cough - again, been a terrible start to the year, now totally run down and I think if another thing hits me I will actually wind up in hospital, it really feels like my body is disintegrating right now. Just one bloody virus after another.

    I'll look up the opening times and probably best if I message you direct if that's OK. I really would love to see you xx
    Mama to two miracles - K born Dec 2011 and T born in Mar 2016

  8. #23
    Registered User LucyMum's Avatar
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    Hiya Savannah, that doesn't sound good at all I hope you're feeling better very soon, there is so much about at the moment xx Spring will be here soon (well we're having a kind of pseudo one now )

    Yes of course it's okay, would be great to meet up xx
    LucyMum The 42 yr old One Tubed Lady
    Out of difficulties grow miracles, Jean de le Bruyere

    Cheering for super sticky BFPs for all the ttc fab fertile fogies

    Mum to Daisy (14), Rosie (12), Ruby (8), Eira (4) & Nerissa born 19/2/16
    MC July 2007 6+3wks Babaloon,
    MC August 2011 10wks, little Tiny Ears RIP babies, we will never forget xxx

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