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Thread: Advice about IVF

  1. #1

    Advice about IVF

    Hi there -

    Anonymous older mum here - in short, we have three children, have had 5 miscarriages (one last September), I'm 44 and time's running out, as we both want just one more. It would complete our already beautiful family.

    OH and I have been trying as much as we can, but with the two of us working and a lot of the time we're wrecked, the TTC window has been quite narrow, so no joy to date. I'm beginning to think that I have only a few months left, I don't want to be getting pregnant for the 9th time at 45, I feel that it's just taking the risk that little bit too far, you know?

    Thing is, my oby/gyn tells me I've probably got adenomyosis, which means that endometrial tissue has grown into the walls of my uterus, making menstruation heavy and painful. I had an anti-mullerian test recently and my values are low, which I think is a good thing - haven't been back to the doctor yet.

    So - what do you guys think of my chances for IVF? It would only be one round as we probably couldn't afford much more. I'm also quite conflicted about embryos being destroyed if they weren't needed etc.

    Does anyone have experience of IVF at this age? What were the challenges faced? Is it possible to make only one or two and implant them both, or do you have to make 18 or 20, as I've heard some people have done?


  2. #2
    This post was rude so I have changed it. Really sorry.
    Last edited by Anonymousoldermum; 15-07-2017 at 02:50 PM.

  3. #3
    Hi I'm so sorry for your losses and that you're having such a hard time. Have you been tested for a cause of the m/cs?
    I think you would have a pretty good chance with IVF, how old are your other children? If you weren't sure about it you could maybe try an IUI first but IVF has much higher success rates. I've never had IVF so can't really help about it but from what I undersyand the reason for producing so many eggs is because only a certain number will fertilise and then they have to survive another 3-5 days so having lots of eggs in the first place gives you a higher chance of a good embryo or two to transfer? xx

    Sent from my SM-G928F using Tapatalk

  4. #4
    I viewed earlier but wasn't able to reply then. My situation hasn't been too dissimilar but just saw your next post and thought it was a tad rude so I hesitated about replying. Your situation isn't, I think, unique here but probably relates to only a small minority of posters. I also have ademomysis but I wasn't aware that it affected fertility. Short history, I have an 8 year old and i'm 43. Son was conceived naturally but our much wanted second baby just wasn't happening. We had 2 rounds of costly IVF, both times I conceived but both times miscarried. My egg counts were very low so I'd recommend a test to check those before IVF so you're prepared for a possible small egg retrieval rate. I'd say your chances of a successful IVF at this age is low, the challenge is a) your egg levels and b) the chances of them turning into a successful pregnancy aren't great. Your concerns about embryos being destroyed would be secondary to me because only a very small percentage of egg retrievals get to that stage. I'd say that if you're desperate at this stage, go with it ASAP and take the professionals advice. It was 3/4 years ago when I had the IVF so I was 38/39.
    Last edited by Kezza; 14-07-2017 at 12:22 AM.
    Cheering Reddybeck to her BFP

  5. #5
    Registered User Sesame seed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    West yorkshire
    I think the nature of your post means it's unlikely lots of people have experience so hence view and no posts.

    I've never had IVF but I did have fertility problems and though we conceived #1 naturally after 18 months we tried for years to get pregnant for number 2 and nothing. We considered going down the IVF route and decided not to. I saw a work colleague go through 5 rounds of ivf at great expense and stress and my best friend had ivf to conceive her dd. We decided given my age 38/39 that our chances were low (is it something like 1:4 normally but decreases with age)

    my friend only had 2 embryos (1 implanted which did result in her daughter) and 1 frozen. She has to pay to keep it frozen until she wants to try again. She actually told me she is scared to try again in case it doesn't work this time and the stress that brings.
    i also think they are reluctant to put 2 eggs back in as multiple pregnancies create a bigger risk.

    I think if your really sure you want to try you need to talk to a specialist- the process can take some time so you really need to start if you want to. Good luck
    Mummy to my handsome, funny, little man

  6. #6
    Thank you for your replies and advice. I'm sorry if I came across rude. I could blame a lot of things, but I suppose there's no excuse for that really. My OH finds me the same lately.

    There were no reasons found for my m/cs, three of them were ectopic though, so I seem to have a predisposition there too. Have had salpingotomies and a dye flush, no problem with my tubes.

    I'm told that adenomyosis reduces the chances of successful implantation by 27%. Add my age to that and I'm amazed I got pregnant last year at all.

    I guess I just wanted to see if anyone else out there was in the same boat, a bit of self justification. I'll go and talk to the experts, and see if they think I'm crazy. Really sorry I was rude, I was being selfish.


    Last edited by Anonymousoldermum; 15-07-2017 at 02:49 PM.

  7. #7
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    @Anonymousoldermum I am sorry to know your story. Unfortunately there too many reasons why a woman might experience pregnancy loss. I would advise to see a fertility specialist to do additional tests. In case genetics is the issues (in most cases it is, particularly during the first trimester) you might discuss pgs ngs with yr doc. Good luck

  8. #8
    Registered User LucyMum's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Hiya, I just wanted to wish you luck and say not to give up. I know two ladies who've had babies at 44, one at 46, and one at 47!

    I don't have any experience of IVF unfortunately although I'd recommend having a fertility mot for both you and your partner as we did when I was ttc number 4 at 37. It's good you've already had the AMH test.

    I'm not far off 44 now and would consider trying for another baby Even if the chances are very low sometimes I think it's better to try than not try at all and have regrets
    LucyMum The 42 yr old One Tubed Lady
    Out of difficulties grow miracles, Jean de le Bruyere

    Cheering for super sticky BFPs for all the ttc fab fertile fogies

    Mum to Daisy (14), Rosie (12), Ruby (8), Eira (4) & Nerissa born 19/2/16
    MC July 2007 6+3wks Babaloon,
    MC August 2011 10wks, little Tiny Ears RIP babies, we will never forget xxx

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