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Thread: 3 year old poo's in pants every day

  1. #1

    3 year old poo's in pants every day

    Can anyone give me tips/advice please? About 4 weeks ago my DS potty trained at 3 years 1 month old, after a couple of false starts in the months previous. I Always wanted to keep things relaxed and wait until he was ready. He was dry, day and night, within about 3 days, doesn't even wear a "just in case" nappy at night anymore. To start off with he also poo'd on the potty or toilet, but in the last fortnight he has pood in his pants every single day. Despite being prompted (and bribed!) he says he doesn't need it, then sneaks off into a another room to go in his pants. Please help!! I can no longer go out with him in pants as this is a nightmare to clean up in public. He is sad about my threats that he'll need to wear pull ups again.

    I've tried stickers, marbles in a jar, sweets, masses of praise for successful toilet trips. I'm am baffled. My DD (age 5) has spent most of her summer holidays in front of the telly waiting for her brother to poo!!
    DD age 5 (born 2011)
    DS age 3 (born 2013)

    mmc July 2010

  2. #2
    Registered User Sesame seed's Avatar
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    Time was the only thing that worked for us.. He was dry at 3 but took another few months for poos (and he woudl wee when he did a poo) then it just clicked and no more problems. We did buy a book about poo and where you do your poo off amazon and that seemed to help. He just literally didn't have the feeling I don't think.
    Mummy to my handsome, funny, little man

  3. #3
    This is exactly my DS he was fully potty trained quite early when he was around 2 he just did it himself and then about 6 months in he started pooing his pants everyday! He would do the same and sneak off into a corner. I just ignored it to be honest, changed his clothes explained he should try go in the potty and left it at that, like sesame it was just time and patience for us. My friend used to smack her little girl, scream and shout, take her home and get really angry and her DD ended up with constipation and took a lot longer.




  4. #4
    thank you both. Sesame, I will look into the poo book! He definitely likes to talk through ideas from books.

    Moominmamma I guess this is just part of the process then. DD didn't do this which is why I'm confused now that DS is doing it, wondering if I'm missing a trick. I completely agree that yelling and punishing is unlikely to help. I kinda think toilet stuff needs to be relaxed or kids end up stressed and constipated etc, like your friend's DD. I can understand the frustration though...
    DD age 5 (born 2011)
    DS age 3 (born 2013)

    mmc July 2010

  5. #5
    Oh god yeah I used to get so frustrated inside! And when one of the women in his nursery wouldn't even bother to shake the poo pout but just bag up the pants with a full log in to sit there festering all day in a plastic bag!!! Lush


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  6. #6
    Registered User Sesame seed's Avatar
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    What!!! She should have been rinsing them!!!!


    the book is called where's the poop, but there are others.

    The other thing was when we spotted him pooing we would rush to loo even if too late and change him in there so he learnt that's where you go! I was really worried as he was starting nursery but then it just came,he did one poo on the loo and it clicked and never had any accidents. It's really hard to not get cross but I think if they aren't ready they aren't ready
    Mummy to my handsome, funny, little man

  7. #7
    do you think it might be a bit hard for him my daughter gets constipated and doesn't like to push on the toilet or potty she comes and tells me when she needs a poo then i put a nappy on she is 3 and a half and i am hoping she will grow out of it i am sure they will xx

  8. #8
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    I've heard so many stories about regressing when toilet trained - but only seem to last for a period of time, so I think it's just soomething you need to get through. My DS only ever has poo accidents actually.... I suppose you can always squeeze a wee out if you're asked, but you can't poo on demand so maybe this is why it takes a bit longer to get it right! Also, some kids start to get embarrased about pooing on a toilet and potty, and so hide away and do it in a corner....

    good luck xxx







    💞 Mmc 19th March 2016. You'll always be in my heart. Chemical pregnancy July 16' Love you both, always will xx

  9. #9
    not just u my 3 and a half year old just pooed on the toilet floor then stood in it yuk bath and cleaned up now kids

  10. #10
    Ug thanks guys, good to know I'm not the only one! We got a 'poo' book - DS loves it but it hasn't helped the penny drop. Will keep trying though. I think when the first poo on the loo happens (not counting the early days of potty training, they are a distant memory now) he'll get it. It was the same with wees. Once he did one on the potty it was like he overcame the fear, or whatever to call it.
    Hope you got that floor clean daydreams!!
    DD age 5 (born 2011)
    DS age 3 (born 2013)

    mmc July 2010

  11. #11
    Registered User LucyMum's Avatar
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    I'm having problems with Eira in this area now. She's very late with the toilet training at nearly 4 - she wees in the loo most of the time now (during the day) but poos she won't do - she'll go off and hide somewhere and do it in her pullups - she says it hurts on the loo.

    I'm going to try putting a stool at the foot of the loo so she has something to put her feet on (I've been lifting her on up until now). I guess the sensation is different. I can't remember really with my others apart from Rosie who we had loads of problems with. I think you're right, time is the answer, I've learned that there's no point getting cross although at times it can be very frustrating!
    LucyMum The 42 yr old One Tubed Lady
    Out of difficulties grow miracles, Jean de le Bruyere

    Cheering for super sticky BFPs for all the ttc fab fertile fogies

    Mum to Daisy (14), Rosie (12), Ruby (8), Eira (4) & Nerissa born 19/2/16
    MC July 2007 6+3wks Babaloon,
    MC August 2011 10wks, little Tiny Ears RIP babies, we will never forget xxx

  12. #12
    i might try a stool too, LucyMum. Maybe my DS needs to have his feet up a bit higher. After pooing in his pants this morning (despite being stood next to the potty) I decided to go back to pull ups. I'm completely sick of cleaning up pooey pants. Thinking about it, he hasn't attempted to poo in the loo once in the last 6-7 weeks so he mustn't be ready. I think he did it in the first week simply because I was putting him on the potty every 20 mins. Got lucky. He should be ok at not weeing in his pull up so we'll see how we go. I Quit!
    DD age 5 (born 2011)
    DS age 3 (born 2013)

    mmc July 2010

  13. #13
    hugs it wont last forever try pull ups for a few more months xx

  14. #14
    So....this poo thing is STILL going on. its been over 6 months now and he's pooed in his pants/pull-up every damn day. Three times in the last 6 months we have caught him just at the perfect moment and got him on the loo - which has resulted in the tiniest poo bit coming out. We have celebrated/rewarded etc. But then an hour later the full poo comes out in his pants.
    Nothing is working. The HV is out of ideas. We've done sticker charts, marbles in-and-back-out-again of a jar, bribes, sweets, the offer of going to diggerland and even flippin disneyland!! Currently have a big box of hot wheel cars on display ready for him to choose his car when the poo hits the loo. Not working. Box still sealed.
    He's not constipated - he has 1-4 soft poos a day (unpredictable quantities and times), each time standing up, each time having snuck off for 2 minutes/waited for me to leave the room. He goes to school in 7 months, I'm really worried... Can anyone help? xx
    Last edited by elletea; 13-02-2017 at 06:23 PM.
    DD age 5 (born 2011)
    DS age 3 (born 2013)

    mmc July 2010

  15. #15
    Registered User Lightning's Avatar
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    I am struggling with this problem with my dd too! She will go for a wee just fine but then goes off and 'hides' to do a poo in her pants. I'm kind of hoping she will just grow out of it but reckon it'll be a long road.


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