Diary: Dealing with a cervical cerclage

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At our 20week scan we thought everything would be fine as we had no sign of anything abnormal. We were meant to be going to a wedding after our scan so were just really excited and happy.

We were called in for our scan and both beaming at the thought of seeing our little one again and finding out if we were team blue or pink (or green if legs were crossed.) Everything was fine at first all measurements were good and we found out we are having a little boy!! When the sonographer tipped the bed back so my head was closer to the floor I gripped for dear life (it is NOT a normal way to be lying and I could feel myself slowly slipping, given I was wearing a silk dress which didn't help lol.) Her face said it all really we knew something wasn't 'normal' She told me I would need to drink as much water as I could and wait 20minutes and then be re scanned as she needed to check my cervix. So I done as I was told and 20minutes and 12cups of ice cold water later we were called back in, I was shaking in fear of something being wrong with our baby and the thought of losing him was completely unbearable so when she said that my cervix were beginning to open and my husband asked what does that mean her reply of 'If they open completely the baby will be born which isn't what we would want at this stage' my husband then felt the need to ask 'will he be ok' which I knew the answer to but the women's silence felt like someone had already ripped my baby from my arms I burst in to tears and couldn't find the strength to control the falling. We were then sent to the consulting room where they sent us just 7months previous after we were told we had lost our first baby the exact same room. We sat and waited for the doctor in absolute silence and all that went through my head were questions 'what had I done wrong?' 'why us?' 'why was my cervix opening now?' and 'will my baby survive?' After around 25minutes of sitting in the room the doctor and a nurse came in and explained that they wanted me to be admitted straight away for a simple operation to put a stitch in my cervix. So we were taken down to the assessment ward where I again burst in to tears as soon as we got to the reception desk. We were taken to a room where Hubby phoned around to let everyone know what had happened as both of our phones had been going crazy with texts and missed calls because everyone wanted to know how the baby was and what we were having and when we would be going to the wedding. I sat on the bed still questioning everything, a man came in the room and I had a cannula put in my arm as well as having 3tubes of blood taken there and then, having a massive fear of needles I wasn't bothered at all by the fact I had this done. My baby was more important to me then a fear I have. We were then taken round to the labour ward where we sat and just waited for someone to tell us something good. After about an hour of being on the labour ward the anaesthetist came round to talk to me about having a spinel or a general anaesthetic, I didn't want to be awake and lying there over thinking more and more so I opted for the general. Another hour past and my hubby had come back up to the hospital after going home to get me a few bits and with in 15minutes of having him there with me I was being taken in the operating room. As soon as I was in there I couldn't help it I burst in to tears again!! Once I had calmed down I remember being put to sleep and then 3hours later I came round in recovery. I remember the first thing I asked was if my baby was OK but I had no answer, so with that fear took hold of me again and I tried my hardiest to get myself to come round properly so I could be taken back to the ward. Around 20minutes after coming round I was taken back to the ward where I asked the doctor if my baby was OK and thankfully he was! I stayed in hospital over night, my husband stayed with me for half hour on the ward and then went home I didn't sleep very well was very sore and emotional but the next day still tired sore and emotional the consultant came round again to see how I was and book a follow up appointment and my hubby had come back up to see me. Thankfully I was able to go home after a few checks we heard baby's heart beat and my BP and pulse were good so was my temperature so we were on our way home. Once home all I wanted to do was sleep so hubby walked up stairs with me and brought me drinks and treats and let the dog up to have cuddles once id woken up. He looked after me for a few day when 4days after the stitch had been put in I started to get tightening's in my back and stomach and what could only be described as a pulsing feeling down below so we went up to the labour ward we had a scan and heard baby's heartbeat again and everything was fine they didn't know what was coursing the discomfort but everything was fine no UTI or anything so we went home again. Two days later I had my follow up appointment where the consultant had said about steroid injections, possible pre term labour as early as 24weeks, getting to 28weeks will be good but 30weeks even better and taking the stitch out if I get to 37weeks. So much to try and absorb my head was spinning. Iv been using these little capsules for 12days now, they aren't the most comfortable things to use, you have to put them inside your 'muffy' the good thing is they also fight off any bad bacteria that can cause thrush.

Up until now everything seems fine and our little boy is very active more appointments yet to come though we face a very long road but as long as at the end of it our little boy is happy healthy and safe all of this will be worth it. x
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